Genesis, Verizon style

It is enlightening and entertaining reading through the Bible in another language.

I’m going through the Bible on a daily basis in Portuguese this year and I’m continually amazed at how a turn of a phrase can give you a whole new insight on what a passage is saying.

Abraham is in the midst of a visitation from Jehovah Almighty. He is told that he is going to be blessed with a son and that this son is going to do fantastic things. With his face on the floor, knowing that God can’t see it, he smiles and laughs silently. It appears he thinks he misunderstood what God just said because obviously that isn’t possible. So, he comes up with a logical explanation and thanks God for blessing him with Ishmael.

In Portuguese it is then stated like this: “What I said was…”

He then, in rapid fire sequence, lays out a series of incredible blessings that Abraham is going to receive through this son Sarah is going to give him. Once he finishes, God “rose up and left” while Abraham is still face down in the dirt.

In other words, “Dude, you don’t have a clue what I’m getting ready to do through you!”

Can you hear me now?

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