Amazingly simple home remedies

  • Avoid cutting yourself when slicing veggies by getting someone else to hold the veggies while you chop.
  • Avoid arguments with the females about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.
  • For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure on your veins. Remember to use a timer.
  • A mouse trap placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.
  • If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives. You’ll be afraid to cough.
  • You only need two tools in life: WE-40 and duct tape. It it doesn’t move, and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn’t move, and does, use the duct tape.
  • If you can’t fix it with a hammer, you’ve got an electrical problem.

Daily Thought:
So many people are like slinkies… they’re not really good for anything but they bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs.

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2 responses to “Amazingly simple home remedies

  1. patrickandchristy

    Why is it rude if a guy doesn’t lift the toilet seat after using but it’s not rude for a girl to leave the seat down after using? Isn’t it just as easy for me to lift it before using as it is for her to lower it before using? Couldn’t Adam have found a better use for that rib!? Putting a little barbecue sauce on it and eating it may have caused some temporary indigestion but wouldn’t have caused a lifelong, centuries long headache dealing with women. Oh well….I can’t leave without my sweet baby so I think I’ll just live with her and keep lifting the toilet seat after using. It’s not too physically demanding and it does score me points to be used for later.

  2. I am an advocate of duct tape, WD 40, and super glue (as in, if it moves, and shouldn’t, maybe it should NEVER move again) when it comes to home repair…thanks for a good laugh–I needed it today!

    Rachele 🙂

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